We believe in Gender Equality!

We believe in Gender Equality!

Really? Do we? All of us who write F next to the gender column should put some thought into it before making strong statements on social networking sites and re-posting feminism quotes.

Our planet is blessed with many creatures and homo sapiens are the most intelligent ones. But the irony is that at the same time we are also the meanest. We raise our voice when we see a woman treated with disrespect but it’s never the other way around.

This morning while coming to the office I encountered a similar situation that made me question my own morals.

A middle aged man, who did not look like a frequent traveler of Kolkata metro, was stuck in an embarrassing situation at a peak hour. He used the wrong gate and ended up standing near the ladies seat. Confused and drenched in the rain, he was trying to make a place for himself to stand. His drenched umbrella jabbed a young college girl at the wrong side. The umbrella was wet, so were his hands and the girl’s T-shirt got wet too. It took a fraction of second for the girl to prove that it was his hands and not the umbrella.

The man kept on apologizing to the girl but the mass didn’t hear to him. The ladies started taunting from their seats, some of them even called him a pervert. The man had to apologise for something that he did not do. He was forced to get down at the next station that I believe was not his destined station.

What made that girl conclude that his intentions were wrong or was it a deep rooted grudge that she holds towards the M clan? Aren’t these feminism quotes creating so much hype that the teenagers/young girls are following them without even understanding the actual meaning of the saying?

We all have come a long way when compared to our earlier generations in terms of our achievements. And that, I agree wouldn’t have been possible without the support from the M clan. The path was of course not that smooth and we had to go through struggle and exertion.

It has taken years and we are still working towards it. We are working towards a better tomorrow, a better world to live in. A world where there wouldn’t be any gender in-equality, where we all be treated as humans and not just as Fs and Ms.

But, when we say we want equality, are we really following it without being biased? Why do we look for Ladies quota and seats then? Why does the saying "Ladies first” still exits? Why a man cannot get raped or sexually abused and its always the woman who is a victim?

Why do we stereotype? Why do we treat every man like a rapist? Just like all women are not sluts, all men are not rapist. They are also Fathers, Brothers, Husbands or Friends of someone.

But how does it matter? The M clan is always inhuman, born to humiliate the F clan. So let us be prepared with our pepper spray and wait for their next move.

The Neighbor!

Moving into a new locality,midst of all conservative bongs was a big challenge for me and trust me their not so social yet nosy nature added more salt to it.It took a long time for me and mom to adjust with the new neighborhood;where who visits your home, what your daughter is wearing, what fish you are eating today and almost every small move is observed and criticized which was very much unlike our township culture. The biggest challenge for me was to make friends and start a new social life here.

We have all seen in the movies about that one annoying neighbor who can make your life hell,but without whom that " fun" element of your living is missing too.Well in my case I won't say he turned out to be an annoying one but yes his not so social attitude was something which annoyed me the most. I remember meeting this person, well not exactly meeting but knowing each others face with no hopes of friendship.We were introduced by our parents. I remember saying Hello to him,for which I didn't get any reply, well the social person in me continued the conversation.I inquired about some colleges where I can get admission after finishing my high school, I got a very cold reply.How can someone be so unsocial and neutral? Ah that poker face got stuck into my mind.

I used to avoid that road if I see him coming from there.I can't take ignorance and he never used to smile, forget saying Hello. How does it feel, being a girl you always say Hello or talk to a person who is least bothered about you being around.So one fine day I decided I am not going to talk to this poker faced creature again, though our families seem to get along well. By the time I had made a good friend in the locality and we were kind of soul sisters. Like me, she had also moved in here recently and going through the same situation as mine. So I finally got a friend, we used to bitch about this weird unsocial creature. Ah bitching gives such a relief  and specially when you have no other useful thing to do.

Days were passing and then came the festival of festivals, the Durga Puja,when the entire colony would gather at the Puja Pandal for 5 days.When everybody was happy and busy shopping for the Pujas,me and my only friend were terrified;how are we going to spend those 5 days at the Pandal where nobody is going to talk to us.Girls simply can't take ignorance. So we gathered some courage,got dressed up in our new clothes and went to the Puja Pandal.I remember sitting at the back with my friend, looked like we were isolated from the mass. Suddenly the poker faced creature makes an entry and joined the mass "wait isn't he an introvert unsocial person who just doesn't talk to anybody". Soon all the guys came and sit near to him, he attracted everybody like a magnet and after some time all I could hear was laughter and giggles.He wasn't talking much but he had something which made others to talk and have fun.Then they started playing antakshari and to our surprise they invited us to join with them. So it was like all unknown guys and only 2 girls.But it didn't take much time for me and my friend to gel with them, thanks to my adaptive and social nature.
Those 5 days of Durga Puja was fun. I thought finally the ice is been broken and we all would be in friendly and talking terms. But it wasn't the way I though it would be.He came back to his patent unsocial mode again.No Hi-Hello, no smiles were exchanged while crossing paths.

One evening,he gave me a CD and said they went for a vacation to the Andaman Islands,so he just thought of sharing the pictures and videos with me. I couldn't say anything due to his unexpected  shocking behavior and took the CD. I was wondering what made him to share the CD with me, or was he just trying to break the ice.
It's been 5 years now; we have come to a place where I actually share lots of things with him like a real friend.
I think some people are better meant to be just good listeners.

Down the memories!!

This blog is dedicated to the place where I was born and raised, have spent 17 years of my precious life here. A small township with broad and clean roads, pollution free and very warm people,an ideal destination for nature lovers, with its innumerable waterfalls, dense forests and variety of flora and fauna.

Down the memories, traveling in the past;

I stand at the cross roads drenched in the rain,

Mist all around,walking down the green mountain;

The clouds are moving faster, the wind is pushing me,

And it's calm and serene as far as my eyes can see;

My soul is happy, Mother Nature is a Bliss.

I feel blessed in my navy blue school uniform,

Red ribbons wrapped on both the braids;

Running behind the herd of cows and one Wounded Knee;

Holding my bestie's hand; singing and chirping together;

It's all green around and the breeze is so soothing;

My soul is happy, Mother Nature is a Bliss.

The days are bright and the smiles are real;

The innocence is pure; the tears are minimal;

Giggles and laughs, plays and fun;

Climbing on the trees, catching the wild wind;

Living in the moment; living in the greens;

My soul is happy, Mother Nature is a Bliss.

City of Joy !

It was in the year 2005 when I permanently moved in to Kolkata, the city I hated. Though Kolkata has always been my destination for summer holidays but I never liked the city. Every year, during my summer vacation I would visit Kolkata with my parents, meet all the relatives under the sun, and update each of them about how the year went for me. Life was moving on a smooth note until the year 2005 came, at the age of 17 life took a 360 degree turn and everything changed. I was packed off to Kolkata for my higher studies. Maa made it sure I stay in a hostel so that I would learn to do my own things and become independent.

The first few months were really queer and homesickness added more flavor to it. This was the first time when I was staying away from my parents. Studies, College, Ragging, Hostel, new friends, days were passing by with it but at the end of the day when I would come to the bed I missed home, I missed my parents, my friends. So this was nothing less than a Russian Revolution in my life. 

Slowly and steadily I started gelling up with the change. Small outing with friends near the bank of Ganges, Metro and Tram rides.. Street shopping at Esplanade, gorging on street food. I was enjoying my College days while exploring a new city. The city I hated the most for its humid temperature, for its sultry streets, overcrowded buses and trains, its laziness and what not and suddenly I had started liking each and every bit of the city. 

The vintage buildings, yellow colored taxis,the colorful Pandals and Idols during Durga Puja,hand pulled rickshaws,the red colored flags during elections and the list was appending with every passing day. Lately I was actually becoming a part of it. The city I hated the most had technically become my City now.

The city which gave me a sweet tooth, introduced me to Plays and Theater, my craziness over Foot Ball, my love for antiques,arts and books. It has redefined the concept of Communism to me.

It made me to fall in love with the color red and yellow, cotton saris, terracotta jewellery and parallel cinema. It nurtured my culinary skills and discovered the "romanticism" in me.Yes, I am a die-hard romantic. 

  

It gave me my short lived flings, heart breaks and friends for life long. The city which witnessed my adulthood, my evolution from a teenage college girl to a Woman.

My dad always used to say “How far you go, how successful you become but you should never forget your roots, your place, and your land".

Today when I am 2000 km away, sitting in my PG room and remembering my good old days just one thing comes to mind.. Who said long distance relationship doesn't last? My love for Kolkata is increasing and deepening by every passing day.

“Home is where my heart is, home is where my parents live”

The Wish List !!

Here I go.... Completed quarter a century.. Lived one fourth of my life.. Thought so much, wanted to achieve so much but seems like I stand on ground zero, still struggling to deepen my individuality.. Sometimes it feels great when you live life on your own terms. When you take your own decisions, when you travel alone, when you stay alone. But at the same time your decisions are always dependent on others, sometimes parents, sometimes friends.. Have you ever thought what you have done for your happiness? Have you ever done something which makes you feel happy, which brings smile on your face?..Hmmmmm not really..Isn't it?

Last night I saw this Hindi movie- Dasvidaniya ( meaning Good Bye in Russian ).. a light genre movie, where the main protagonist is diagnosed  with cancer and realized, what all he had missed in his 37 years of life and then decides to fulfill  his top 10 wishes before he dies.. starting from learning to play guitar to fall in love.. The movie kind of inspired me to work on my own wish list.. What I want to do in life and when I grow old I should have a good stock of stories and real time experiences to pass on to my next generation and more of it when I die I shouldn't die with this repent in my heart that I've never done anything for myself..

I still remember that day when I told Maa that I want to color my hair.. Well she wasn't really convinced..She thinks a bong girl should have long black lustrous hair.. and me being a "Good Girl" didn't go against her.. Then came the idea of getting my rim pierced.. Maa came up with the idea of getting my nose pierced.. and she tried to bribe me also with a diamond nose pin.. Yuckk... I never liked nose piercing.. and she thinks that only tribal people pierce their ear rim. Again I have to suppress my wish..

 Daddy wanted me to learn music.. He thinks music is in my blood.. but Harmonium never attracted me, though I like to listen to others when they sing and yes all the girls in my family sing quite well,me being an exception.. I wanted to learn classical dancing which again never happened.. But now I think if I really wanted to do this I should have done it..Why I waited for someone to say " YES..Go for it.."?

Being a single child, I've grown up alone... Being with someone, growing with someone is a feeling that I've always craved for..  Now I want to raise a puppy.. I know there is no connect me being a single child and raising a puppy but yes that's my wish and one day I would definitely get a puppy and prove everybody wrong who thinks that I am not old enough to take responsibilities..

Well getting myself inked is one more thing that really excites me. All my friends say that I am a real Virgo, I am someone who is very earthy and feminine.. will make a good mother and wife.... Soon I'm getting inked, Virgin Maiden or Virgo Symbol..

Life is all about gaining experiences..and you always end up learning something new..There is an old saying "It's better to be late than never".. and Now when my wisdom tooth is coming in and I've entered into the 25th year of my life, I make a fresh start.. and it starts with pampering myself , listening to my heart and keeping myself happy.. They say " WE ARE YOUNG ONLY ONCE"...

When Monotony Strikes

When monotony strikes, I look at the sky

I search for my star, which leads my fate,

It looks so bright, makes me shine,

Since birth to mourn,they say it's mine,

Guiding my destiny , making me fly,

When I want something ,it makes me Sigh,

I crave for it,  I pray to my God,

To give me strength, make me bold,

When the days are bright, the Sun is high,

I walk down the road, I see them crawl,

I hope for the best, filled with zest,

The light gets down, the sky gets dark,

I look at the sky, I search for my star,

Which leads my fate,every now and then,

I wait for the dawn, I make a new start,

I walk down the road, I see them crawl.

When monotony strikes, I look at the sky...

Wedding Bells All Around

One fine morning you just wake up and see that the world is moving on a different note altogether,there is something different in the breeze,something which is so soothing but at the same time its very ill fitting and then you discover that all your girl friends are getting married,all of them with whom you have grown up,shared your thick and thin,with whom you have planned about your wedding and how your prince charming would be and blah blah,they won't be Bachelorette anymore like you .Soon they will become somebody's wife,daughter-in-law and would be eligible for all the relations which we have on this earth. You are no more in the list of their bandwagon and soon they will create an isolated society for themselves and you have to be a registered Mrs. to enroll your name there. Now their priorities in life would change,they won't be there for you through out the night when you are not getting sleep and want somebody to talk to.They would be resting on their hubby dear's arms when you are talking to your inner conscience since you had a bad day and you wanted to share how it was.

 Is marriage an equator which divides a woman's life into two halves?Are both these halves totally different from each other? Is life totally different with the vermilion on your forehead? Well to know all the queries I've to be one among them I guess.
Wishing you all a very happy and successful married life Sistas :-)
 I wish life always remains the same for us.